How To Write A Birth Plan

After giving birth to my second child, I was quite the talk of the maternity ward. It wasn’t because I arrived at the hospital 9.5 cm dilated or that labor progressed so quickly that my midwife barely made it in time (both of which are true). It was because of my birth plan. Before my first child was born, I developed a birth plan that I used for both deliveries. It wasn’t anything too unusual or bizarre, at least not in my opinion. It included things like I wanted the option to eat during labor, keep my contact lenses in, have access to a birthing tub, have my partner by my side at all times, be allowed to progress free of stringent time limits, and do it all without the aid of drugs and other interventions.

So why was my plan the talk of the ward? Because according to the nursing student who spoke at length to me about it, she had never seen one before. She was so amazed by the whole idea that other classmates joined her in my room to discuss how I developed it and what had gone into the process. In that moment, I realized how important the plan was to me, not because I felt it was directions for the hospital to follow, but because it helped me understand what my goal was and kept me focused on achieving it. How did I develop the plan?

• Research. I did a lot of research beginning the moment I found out I was pregnant. I read books like “The Thinking Woman’s Guide to a Better Birth” by Henci Goer, attended birthing classes and listened to moms tell about their experiences. Gathering all that information helped me better understand the birth process and my personal preferences.
• Write. With a general framework of preferences in mind, I went online to the Baby Center’s website and used a program to create my personalized plan. I simply clicked a few boxes, typed in a few descriptions and printed out my own plan.
• Discuss. I didn’t wait for the labor pains to begin and then surprise the hospital staff with my hopes and desires. I presented my plan to my midwife during a prenatal visit. She looked it over and we discussed it. She let me know if anything was unusual or against hospital protocol so we could have that discussion up front and before the heat of labor. The talk helped me to further confirm that she was the correct care provider for me. I also made sure my birth advocate, my husband, was informed and that he could speak for me if need be.

By the time I entered the hospital, I knew what was realistic and what was not. I gave the labor and delivery nurse a copy and was comforted by the fact that my husband and midwife were by my side with the knowledge of my preferences already in mind.

Because I did the work up front to understand labor and my own personal philosophy, I knew what my preferences were. During the throes of labor, that knowledge kept me focused and moving forward, and made me feel as though my midwife and medical staff were working alongside of me as a team. The births of my two little ones were something I was involved in and not medical conditions that were happening to me. As a result, I had two good birth experiences and two healthy babies.

Did my births go 100 percent according to plan? Not exactly. But the point of developing the plan wasn’t to create a step-by-step outline of what labor and delivery would be like. Each birth is different and we can’t totally prepare for each twist and turn of the journey ahead. But what my plan did was put me and those around me in the right mindset so if a twist did occur, we had an idea of how to handle it. It empowered me to make well-informed decisions concerning both my baby and me.

As the nursing students continued to ask questions, I wondered how women could do labor without a plan or at least some amount of forethought. Perhaps it doesn’t have to be as formalized as the one I created, but to do the research and have the discussions up front with your care provider will certainly help prepare you for the journey to childbirth. Keep in mind that even the best-laid plan can be sidetracked. But knowing your preferences ahead of time will help keep you more focused when the pain sets in or a twist or turn comes along.


What about you? Did you create a birth plan? If so, did you find it helpful?

The post How To Write A Birth Plan first appeared on Unexpectant.com 

You Are Not a Lemon

Today I offer a simple quote of encouragement for all you pregnant women out there and even for those who aren’t. It comes from the very wise and prominent midwife, Ina May Gaskin:

 

“Your body is not a lemon.” In a society where we often hear that our bodies are broken or ugly or need improvement, remember these words. In a country that has over a 30% c-section rate (the World Health Organization recommends the rate be under 15%), this can be a fact that women don’t hear often enough, if at all. But I believe Psalm 139:14 when it says “I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” And, I want you to believe it as well.

The truth is our bodies are pretty awesome. I mean they can grow little humans. And, sometimes they grow more than one little human at a time. And your uterus that protects those little humans starts out the size of a pear, but it expands about 500 times from its original size over the 40-ish weeks of gestation. Then within a month after birth, it returns to its pre-pregnancy size. Our bodies can nourish those little humans, while they are still inside and even afterwards through breast milk. In fact, our bodies are so awesome that the breast milk we create changes over time to meet the nutritional needs as our babies grow and change. We don’t have to take any special pills or drink any magic potions to make this possible; it just intrinsically and instinctively happens.

Now, I understand that there is a time and a place for certain birth interventions. I know that c-sections can and do save lives. And, I’m not saying that natural birth is the only way to go. But, I do know that many women fear birth. They fear what will happen to their bodies. They question whether or not they are capable of doing it. Take for instance what Nicole Klemp said in her birth story, “Before I was even pregnant, the thought of giving birth was terrifying. I was certain there was no way something the size of a watermelon was going to come out of me without ending in my untimely death.”

She is certainly not the only woman to feel this way and, sadly, oftentimes our society and even doctors don’t tell women otherwise.Instead, they perpetuate the dialog that discourages women from realizing just how awesome their bodies actually are. But, what Nicole discovered was that she was capable and that birth wasn’t as frightening as she had anticipated. In fact, she titled her story “That Wasn’t So Bad.”

So, if you are pregnant, ignore those negative voices, whether they are internal or external. Instead, do your research. Get the facts. Learn about birth. Find a midwife or physician who practices evidence-based care, not convenient care. As my midwife has often said:

“My job is to make sure [your birth is] safe and your job is to make sure it’s what you want.” ~ Kristin Vincent, midwife

And, even beyond birth, remember that your body is not a lemon. You are not a lemon. You are more capable than you realize. Pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding and motherhood can be downright tough and exhausting both physically and mentally. But hear these words: YOU CAN DO IT. You were wonderfully made and designed to do it. You are not broken. The truth is you’ve been given a pretty awesome body that has been designed to do some really incredible things. Believe in it. Believe in yourself. And, know that you are not a lemon.

If you are pregnant and want to learn more about pregnancy and birth, take a look at my top five book recommendations. And, especially pick up a copy of Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth. It’s packed full of important and helpful info for every pregnant woman.

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7 Ways To An Informed Birth

Giving birth is one of the biggest experiences of our lives. At what other point do our efforts result in bringing a new life into this world? Yet, women often go into birth with a lack of information. The result? Oftentimes it’s less than optimal. So what can you do try to improve that outcome? Be informed every step of the way. Here are 7 ways to have a more informed birth.

Read a lot.

Start with this list of my top 5 books on pregnancy and birth. But, go beyond the expected. Also, read books that cover the history of birth to get an overview of where we have been, where we are and where we might be headed. Check out “Birth: The Surprising History of How We Are Born by Tina Cassidy and Get Me Out: A History of Childbirth from the Garden of Eden to the Sperm Bank by Randi Hutter Espstein. Read statistics and perspectives on birth such as Pushed: The Painful Truth About Childbirth and Modern Maternity Care by Jennifer Block. Read real stories here and in books like Labor Pains and Birth Stories: Essays on Pregnancy, Childbirth, and Becoming a Parent edited by Jessica Powers.

Watch and listen.

Take a look at the documentary “The Business of Being Born” and listen to podcasts such as Preggie Pals.

Interview practitioners.

Explore your options before choosing a doctor or midwife. Decide what type of practitioner you want and how involved you want to be in your birth. Schedule meet-and-greets and ask questions. Find out what their c-section rates are, how often they induce, whether they continuously monitor the fetal heart rate, what their policy is on moving around during birth and more. Choose your practitioner when you are happy with the answers you received. Decide if you would also like a doula.

Seek advice.

Every mom has a story and she loves to tell it. Ask moms you know what it was like, if it went well and what she would do differently. Read through the birth stories on this site, as well.

Take a class.

Explore different options such as HypnoBirthing, Lamaze, Bradley method, your local hospital’s classes or the online Birth Boot Camp classes.

Develop a plan.
Once you’ve done your research, you will better understand what an optimal birth looks like to you. Write it down in a birth plan, discuss it with your practitioner, take it with you to the hospital, and talk with the labor and delivery nurses upon check-in.

Go beyond the birth.

Remember that a whole new world opens up once your little one enters the world, so study up on what’s to come after the labor pains stop. Be informed about breastfeeding, diapering options, sleep solutions and more.


Birth can be full of twists, turns and uncertainties, but by becoming informed, you better your chances of having a more optimal birth experience.

The post 7 Ways To An Informed Birth appeared first on Unexpectant.com